Heft

I like The Actor's Studio TV program with James Lipton on which he interviews celebs. He always asks a series of questions, one of which is "What is your favorite word?"  I've been pondering this question for years, as there are so many to choose from.  I finally figured it out.

My favorite word is "heft."  It says a lot in four letters.  The dictionary says this: lift or carry something heavy; the weight of someone or something; heaviness; ponderosity; burden.  I see it as much more.  Heft signifies grit and strength, meatiness, depth, importance, capacity, mental acuity. It is a visual word for me. 

my art - is there heft in this?

There is a recent TV series called Boss starring Kelsey Grammer as a ruthless Chicago Mayor.  In one episode, asked by a political contender what Boss has to offer with his endorsement that he does not already have himself.  Boss replies "I have heft."

When you have heft, you have power, authority, respect - any number of influences.  Used well, heft can be a contributor to great good.  I just love the word and all its nuances.

Prescribe or Prevent?

Western medicine  pays a lot of lip service to prevention, but my experience tells me it embraces early diagnosis, not true prevention.  Also, I see that our doctors are

prescription-happy and it seems that they allow patients to drift into chronic diseases because it is easier to prescribe than to prevent.

It's hard to manage chronic ailments, even at their early stages.  With doctors seeing 2 - 3 times as many patients per day as is beneficial to either of them, it's no wonder the patient gets no attention.  

I have learned that the patient has to be her own advocate and while this is a worthy pursuit, the patient has not gone to medical school and consequently does not know how to advocate properly.  By the time she figures out what's going on, things have progressed, health issues are more complicated, and frustration is pretty high.  Alternative medicine works for some, but why must people be thrust into solutions that health insurance won't cover?

There has to be a better way.  Wish I knew what it was.

Memory Lane

 As we get older, we get nostalgic.  It's not that the "old days" were better (they probably were not), but, more likely, the accumulated memories remind us that we've had a life of interest and association.  Our worlds start getting smaller with passing time as we no longer rush into the workplace to meet the daily challenges, so the memories of all those interactions and associations, good or bad, take on a different kind of importance.

We seem to know when it's time to make an overture into the past, when it is time to seek out those few in our lives who impacted us in such a way that we don't forget.  We think of them fondly (or maybe not so fondly, in some cases) and the desire to stay validated in a changing world is worth the strain of finding the ones we liked and connected well with in more harried times.

I've sought out "old friends" a number of times in the last five years.  It's always been a pleasure to hear from them.  Sometimes they turned out to be completely as I remembered, and other times, my memory did not serve me so well. But in every case, the reconnection reminded me of a time in life when important things were going on for me - different important things than are happening now - and, in each case, the trip down memory lane was a treat.

It's a Couples World

The world appears to be made up of those who are "coupled" and those who are not.  The latter group is heavily populated with women for reasons of longevity and greater numbers, in general.  When I was a younger single woman, I often wondered why I was excluded from couples get-togethers and still don't quite get it, to this day.  I have one friend who  regularly included me in these gatherings, for which I've been ever grateful.  And certainly, others have included me over the years, but the general rule is that having an extra single man at the table is a treat and an extra single woman is avoided.

It finally occurred to me that I was a threat to many women's "coupledom."  The most blatant demonstration of this was the time I sat at one end of a sofa chatting with the husband of a friend who sat at the other end. When the wife saw this, she rushed over and sat between us.  What was she afraid of?  That I would physically attack her husband or more subtly try to lure him from her?  Puh-leez. Trust me, I haven't yet met another woman's husband that I would have wanted as my own.  They were great guys, but they were not available. Period. 

With all our "liberation" in these modern times, in many situations single women are like the plague - to be avoided at all costs.  It's a pity.  

Empty Brain

 
Another few days have gone by without even a hint of a great blog entry idea!!  I must be on brain freeze.

Maybe there's just too much going on right now!  I don't know, but it seems that managing a house gets more complicated all the time!!  It's a good thing I got to retire - no time for work these days!!

So to keep you tantalized, here's a little piece of my art - a little jester for a little laugh.

A Certain Thrill

There is a certain thrill that comes with joyful involvement.  It means different things to different people, but to me, when I am focused on something important to me - like my art, or redecorating, or writing this blog, I get a feeling that cannot be described.  It is more than satisfaction.  It is like moving forward with a twinkle.  

one of my whimsical art pieces

The feeling doesn't come from anything I can readily identify, but it is there and it is real.  Maybe it's just being committed to something that does it.  Or being involved in an effort that you would not normally pursue on a regular basis.  It's rather elusive, but, nonetheless, it is there and I can almost taste it.  

There have been many times in all our lives when the heaviness was palpable and we weren't sure we'd get through it.  Well, this feeling of joyful involvement is just the opposite of that heaviness. It is not a false euphoria that goes away as quickly as it comes. It leaves a residue of good feeling that contributes to overall well-being in the longer term.  Maybe it is just contentment, knowing we have achieved something close to a purr.

I like to think it's my whimsical side bursting out more and more.  What is it for you? 

Square Pegs in Round Holes

It just doesn't pay to be a square peg in a round hole.  The world is made for the mainstream, ordinary, and usual.  It is not set up for anyone who veers off the main course, even slightly.  It makes life tough for those who want things just a bit different.

For example, I don't like my garden trimmed with electric hedgers - makes everything look too formal. And since I like a more natural look, I pay extra for it. 

I don't like being forced to travel with a roommate.  But if I don't, I pay a lot extra for it.  When I make changes to my home, I like to have it my way - not the contractor's easiest way.  I pay extra for it.

When I have someone clean my home, I don't want toxic products used.  I pay extra for it.  If I have a medical need that Medicare or my health plan doesn't think I should have, I pay extra for it.

It would be better if I was a "yes" person - yes sir, whatever you say, sir. I'll take it any way I can get it, sir. OK, deliver it YOUR way, sir.

But square pegs don't go in round holes, no matter how hard they try.  Which are you??   

's

What is the problem with using apostrophes?  If there is one punctuation error that feels to me like nails scratching on a chalkboard, this is the one.    Has grammar become completely obsolescent?  While I'm probably preaching to the choir, here is the rule:

I'm not using THIS bank

Use " 's"  when you want to show possession. For example:  "This is Stefanie's blog."  The apostrophe before the "s" shows that I own the blog.

Use no apostrophe when you want to show a plural. For example:  "There are two Stefanies sitting in the room."

What is so hard about that rule?  Why does most of the American population think they have to put an apostrophe before any "s"??  This drives me crazy.  And here's a double grammar whammy I just came across: "Heroe's in my life."  Don't even get me started on how wrong this one is.

Eek-from a sign painter, no less.

I guess teaching grammar went the same way as teaching cursive handwriting.  Excuse me, but what do they teach in school anymore besides teaching for the tests??